Monthly Archives: September 2017
King’s Quest (2015) Chapter 3: Once Upon a Climb
Graham finds true love by getting trapped in a tower with two sexy ladies! This fall on NBC!
See the doodles!
Part 1: Graham breaks the laws of time and space in order to save Cedric the owl. The world doesn’t make sense anymore…
Part 2: In this Director’s Cut of King’s Quest II, Graham searches for his Girl in the Tower and immediately strikes out.
Part 3: Graham helps clean the house of two somewhat disinterested girls and then plays some card game with them while trying to avoid their ugly roommate. Geez, it’s like being in college again…
Part 4: The blacksmith tells Graham to lower his standards if he hopes to find true love. Meanwhile, we learn several green people’s backstories, and a pretty princess ball happens, which is clearly the night we want to live over and over again.
Part 5: A couple of old people uncomfortably judge the worthiness of the girl that Graham is on a date with, even though said girl doesn’t really like him. I’m beginning to think this game truly is based on my life. Well, aside from the magic towers and evil goblin masterminds.
Part 6: After spending several minutes trying to impress the wrong girl with a puzzle box, Graham finally goes out with the girl who likes him, who immediately falls off a cliff. Twice.
Part 7: Graham finally finds love and also tries to give Hagatha some self-esteem, but he can’t — WHISPER MUST INTERRUPT TO SAY HOW GREAT IT IS THAT WHISPER IS THE BEST PART OF THIS ADVENTURE!
Part 8: In the finale, Frozen meets Tangled! Also Graham spends time with his true love: pancakes!
Donkey Kong for the Atari 800
The complete classic, with the Pie Factory level! Mario tries to rescue Pauline, until she ghosts him on OKCupid.
Clowns & Balloons for the Atari 800
It’s like Breakout/Arkanoid, but with more injuries.
Kangaroo for the Atari 800
Can the momma save her little joey, or will she get murdered by monkeys?