King’s Quest VII: the game that results from the question, “What if Sierra got a glimpse into the future, saw all of our King’s Quest doodles, and decided to make a game from it? Also, terrible animation and voice acting?” Once again featuring The Sister.

See the doodles!

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Part 11: We return months later to find out how a Queen performs community service. Also we steal the pants off a bear.

Part 12: The game laps itself (again) as Valanice visits *sigh* Ooga-Booga Land. Also, we get run over by a horse and visit Etheria, which resembles the fever dream of Homer (the writer) and Lisa Frank.

Part 13: Everyone in the kingdom is waiting to die, so we decide to go to sleep. ACTION-PACKED! Then we’re attacked by a doodle! The fourth wall will not save us!

Part 14: The voice actors get so bored with this game that it sounds like one falls asleep in the middle of his lines. Then Valanice finds math, rips off King’s Quest II (maybe?), and stares at a well-endowed wind spirit for an uncomfortable amount of time.

Part 15: The “exciting” conclusion! Trolls are turned into princes! Lava is stopped by spiderwebs! “Frozen” is ripped off 20 years before it came out! And endgame cutscenes are repeated because Sierra!

Doodle video:

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King’s Quest VII: the game that results from the question, “What if Sierra got a glimpse into the future, saw all of our King’s Quest doodles, and decided to make a game from it? Also, terrible animation and voice acting?” Once again featuring The Sister.

See the doodles!

Page 1 | 2

Playlist:

Part 1: We Really Wanted To Be A Don Bluth Film.

Part 2: Is the Native American pool statue a man or a woman? YOU make the call! Also, Rosella turns into Gadget from Chip ‘n Dale Rescue Rangers.

Part 3: Troll Fetch Quest! That’s a nice golbol.

Part 4: Do we murder a troll or murder ALL the trolls? Also, Rosella turns back into a human after briefly becoming a Looney Tunes character.

Part 5: Rosella evades a villain with the most confusing motives ever. Meanwhile, Valanice resolves the Chapter 1 cliffhanger in, like, five seconds.

Part 6: Masquerade! Hideous faces on parade! Masquerade! Hide your face so the poodle will not find you!

Part 7: Valanice is still putzing around in the off-brand Alice in Wonderland town, but at least the rock man eventually sneezes her back into the desert.

Part 8: In our continuing theme of ripping off Disney movies, Rosella travels to Halloweentown. Also, you have to talk to the gravedigger several times to get the plot to move! GAAAAAAAAAAAMME!

Part 9: It wouldn’t be a King’s Quest game without being at the mercy of the Random Number Gods. “But SOMETIMES when you blow a horn…”

Part 10: We find the ancient artifact that will destroy Ursula, er, Malicia, but it’s missing its mini-USB charging cord. Then Rosella explores the part of the game we previously saw as Valanice. Too bad Valanice is in prison.

Doodle Video:

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